Two Bitter Photoshop Stories:
- Spent 3 hours Photo-shopping a dark blurry picture of Ex Boss’s baby in a messy kitchen background onto a white background, editing colors, removing shadows, drool and hair flyaway’s for his passport- result: “Never mind I guess I will have to take him to a photo studio after all…” Really? I already told you that before I slaved off knowing that the results will not be ‘Passport-friendly’. Sometimes you just need to do it so your boss won’t think you are unable or unwilling.
- Client brought a printed image of two tango dancers in a street and wanted it to be to blown up into a 8f tx 5ft banner. I explained calmly and patiently why it won’t look good for ten minutes and asked for a better quality one, she looked extremely puzzled got mad at me and stormed out. 1. It wasn’t a digital file it was a faded print with water stains on it, creating a half watercolor effect 2. The photo was taken in direct sunlight, so half the picture was silhouette and half the image and background was blown out into white because of the light, making the figures half zombie half what-the-hell-is-that -glob? 3. The image was enlarged from a thumbnail, so it was already pixilated”. Need I say more?
Some Photoshop Facts and Tips:
- “Photoshop” has the word “photo” in it so it is pixel based. Logos and text created in Photoshop will not look good when enlarged because they are not vector based. Want a logo? Use Illustrator.
- Photoshop is not instant plastic surgery, but it helps a lot.
- Photoshop is time consuming, so respect the editing time.
- Photoshop has the power to make you look better or worse.
- If a photo is not decent quality, there is a certain limit that Photoshop can improve it.
- Photoshop is not magic but it is pretty awesome.
- Don’t over edit photos into super perfect, specifically face wrinkles. Mellow out the wrinkles, if you remove them completely the person will look unnatural.
- If a photo is shot right it will not need a lot of retouching just minor adjustments.
- You can never stop improving your Photoshop skills. There is always more to learn.
- Photoshop is fun and you can get very creative with it.
- Always save your original file and your layered .PSD file.
- Constantly save your work after you “Save as” by using Ctrl+s.
Ridiculous Photoshop requests and Sarcastic responses:
-He doesn’t like his glasses, can you Photoshop them off his face?
Um, I can spend an hour doing that, or he can take another picture without them so his face won’t look strange.
-Can you use the skinny filter and make me look 50 pounds thinner?
Sorry, there is no filter to shed pounds off, but I can spend hours fixing something you will still be unhappy with. Just embrace the way you look while posing better for the camera.
-Can you make my hair look straight?
Sorry, there is no flat iron feature, extreme free time or will for me to want to do that.